Do you know that feeling when you start to realize you may be kinda’ lost? Then you just keep on going hoping that you will see something familiar to get you back on track… You visualize where you want to be and then open your eyes hoping you are really getting there. Sometimes it works. But sometimes, you just keep going, and going, and going… ‘til you are good and really, really lost.
Well, that’s been me. Somewhere between graduating college, becoming an Occupational Therapist, getting married (20 years ago), becoming a mom, leaving OT work, having 6 kids, and moving 7 times, I managed to get myself really, really lost!
Thanks to my Uncle S, I am finding my way to who I was, who I am and where I want to go.
Who was I? I was happy and ‘high on life.’ My favorite word was “Chai” – the Hebrew word for Life. I was usually reserved, but loved music and dancing with (or without) others. I strove to help others and make them feel welcome and successful, always reminding the people around me to smile. My second favorite word was “Shalom,” meaning Peace – I strove for creating a calm, welcoming environment that others were comfortable relaxing in and being themselves in. Now, my kids remind me to smile and I cannot remember the last time I truly relaxed. Yep – I got lost.
What’s in a name?! Some people name their children by qualities they see in them or want to see in them… Joy, Bella, Grace… I’m pretty sure having a bee for a daughter was not what my parents had in mind when they named me Devorah (meaning honey bee). Throughout my life I’ve been called Debbie, Deb and Deborah. But, at the heart of it all, I am Devorah, a bee.
I came out of my cocoon in my junior year in high school and became very good at being a busy, worker bee. I buzzed around, constantly in motion, doing my part, in school, work, volunteering, parenting, organizations, etc. I liked to work independently, but always sought direction from others for where to plunge my efforts. Nearly thirty years later this is still what I do, but I am realizing that others are looking to me to be a leader. It is time for me to change my view of myself from that of a worker bee to now realize and develop my abilities to be a queen bee. I have big dreams – I need to be the leader to make them happen. As Darren Hardy, publisher of Success Magazine, says, “If it’s to be, it’s up to me.”
While I am starting to see myself in a new light, I have a new view of my surroundings. I have stockpiles of:
- Nectar – sweet experiences and inspirations waiting to get processed into honey to use and share
- Honey – sweet things ready to enjoy and share – great recipes, activities, ideas, and resources
- Flowers to see and enjoy – the beautiful things that grow around my “honey tree” as a result of stirring up the pollen in the search for sweet nectar.
- Weeds – I hope that in the search for beauty and sweetness through this blog, I will help peel away and get rid of the layers of weeds that clutter the view of the beautiful garden around us and have blocked the paths we wish to explore.
So, welcome to my honey tree, where I strive to discover, gather, and share the sweet things of life. I hope you will find nectar and honey to enjoy and will share some nectar and pollen of your own to make the surrounding flower garden grow in new and ever-more beautiful ways. Join me in The Honey Tree Buzz.